In this video Dr. Becky Bailey is talking about conflicts, and the contrast between the "Traditional Model of Discipline" and "Conscious Discipline"
What do I do when I think upset or a tantrum is likely to erupt? Let’s face it; some situations are more likely to evoke upset than others. The keys to navigating these rough waters are composure, assertiveness, encouragement and choices. First and foremost, you must remain calm and in control of your own internal state. Breathe deeply and use affirmations to assist yourself in this process. Next, focus on assertive language with your child. Give an assertive command that paints a picture of what you want the child to do. For example, “It’s time to get out of the tub. Reach your hands up to the towel.” If the child complies, say, “You’re doing it! Your arms are up just like this (model for the child).” If the child refuses, say, “I’m going to help you start getting out.” If the child complies this time, say, “That’s it. You’re doing it. It’s hard to stop when you are having fun.” If the child refuses and turns or jerks away, notice the child’s body by saying, “Your arms went like this (demonstrate) and your head went like this (demonstrate).” When your child looks to see what you are doing, take a breath and say, “There you are!” Then offer two positive choices such as, “You can get out of the water and into the towel or you can pull the plug and then get into the towel. Which do you choose?” |
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